“Ah! Hello—oh! Hello there! Yes. Internet. Hello!

I have been told on certain occasions…occasionally holiday occasions—that I am excellent at giving advice. Yes. Yes. So…yes, I’ve been told. However, one cannot give advice that is not asked for. This—this you see—can you see? Am I blocking your view, not you, the lady behind me, oh! Alright. Yes. Fine. Ah! Back to you! This is impolite. Ah! Ah yes, it would be impolite of me to just give advice to the world blindly.

Please—if you please—send me your questions…your problems…your stories of feeling lost on the San Jose expressway…and I will do my best to answer them in print.

Namaste.” - My BFF Jeff Goldblum

Jeff is going to do an advice column for a comedy website—though he is deathly serious about his advice. The humor, he says, will be in the truth he utters.

So, please, please, PLEASE send me your questions and Jeff will offer his advice.

Namaste.

10 months ago  /  15 notes